Don't Bother With This Book

I went to PA. Lancaster County. My friend Greg gave me a book to read, Shadows In Lancaster County, saying, "It's great. You'll love it."

Wrong on both counts.

Some of the poorest writing I've read. Ever.

Contrived, stupid, poorly put together, a gross underestimation of the intelligence of readers (which may reflect the intelligence of the writer), mistakes in the book--editing and proofing--too many words and too much extraneous detail, very predictable, except for the ending, which came out of the blue and led me to think even the author didn't know who dunnit until she had to come up with someone and this someone just happened to be the only "spare" person, if you know what I mean.

And the main character, someone we need to like, is someone I can't like. She is a skip tracer. We know that because she tells us and because she keeps getting out her skip tracer forms. One second she is smart and experienced and capable of just about anything, the next incapable of even intelligent thought. Why? Because she still loves Reed who kissed her once 11 years ago.

Oh yeah, and God is her co-pilot, so to speak. She brings in religion from time to time, and it's like, "Oh, I haven't mentioned prayer for a while or God or going to church. Better get something in here about that."

I am religious. Things spiritual matter to me. But her use of these things DOES NOT WORK in this book.

Here's one plot jiggle for you. A guy is murdered--turns out by his mother-in-law, the botanist, who is divorced (making her "spare") from his father-in-law and employer, the drug company owner, who is a good guy after all--and the murdered man's wife, I think so she won't have to grieve much, is suddenly dying of cancer. Handy.

And here's another thing. No one in the book is just a person. Everyone is something else important sounding. Except for the Amish.

I finished it so I could tell Greg I read it. But I wonder, did he love it? Think it great? Can I tell him what a mess it actually is? These things are difficult. Maybe I can tell him two of the characters had lunch at the Greenfield Inn, just a walk from my hotel in Lancaster and leave it at that.

Really!

How to Make a Poncho from a Shower Curtain

Well, duh. I'm pretty sure I know how without reading the directions.

A Few Good Words

President Monson, speaking at UVU's commencement after receiving an honorary Doctorate of Public Service:

Glance backward.

Merely a glance at the past. It is not practical to think one can return to dwell in it.

Reach outward.

“To find real happiness, we must seek for it in a focus outside ourselves. No one has learned the meaning of living until he has surrendered his ego to the service of his fellow man. Service to others is akin to duty, the fulfillment of which brings true joy.

“We do not live alone—in our city, our nation or our world. There is no dividing line between our prosperity and our neighbor’s wretchedness. Try as some of us may, we cannot escape the influence our lives have upon the lives of others. Ours is the opportunity to build, to lift, to inspire and to lead . . .”

Press forward.

“Whatever part you choose to play on the world stage, keep in mind that life is like a candid camera; it does not wait for you to pose.

“Learning how to direct our resources wisely is a high priority. We don’t have to keep up with change—we have to keep ahead of it.

“ . . . for we understand full well that complaining is not thinking. Ridiculing is not reasoning. Accountability is not the for the intention but for the deed. No person is proud simply of what he or she intends to do.”

Nothing Much

Carlotta Torres is a name my husband called me sometimes. Just for fun. That answers the two questions I have received about it.

This is a blog no one reads; that should be freeing.

I spoke, along with the temple matron, in the Columbia Village ward Enrichment meeting; they had invited Oregon Trail ward, too. I suppose it went well. I mean my talk. Hers was good.